My sewing room is the Love-and-Romance section of my home’s bagua. John and I had a weekend full of spit and irritation, perhaps triggered by the heat (5 weeks in a row, now). Didn’t sleep well; came back to Raleigh for the work week and thought about facing another weekend like that one and don’t want to do it. For today, I can’t figure out exactly what caused the tension. However, I can apply the St. Francis Prayer: accept what I can’t change and change what I can. That room is a mess. I CAN clear out my sewing room.
My Getting Things Done list shows an entry dated March 13, 2011: Home / Maintenance / Clear sewing room. It is August 8 today, five months later, and I’ve made no progress. I added a “due date” of Friday, August 12, and in study breaks from my work, have been doing repeated 27-fling boogies on the room. The energy is thick. I took a fan into the room and it’s blowing steadily, helping to clear out the stuck energy, and the dust.
Interestingly, the Love and Romance section of the bagua in John’s house is the room intended for his future bedroom, but currently a “storage” room. We need to make an effort to shift those boxes next time we’re at his place for the weekend. This isn’t a one-sided problem.
If you draw a 3×3 grid on your home, the love and romance section of the bagua is the back right 9th (section 3,3) of your home. Stand at the door you use the most often to set the front. (BTW, the Finance and prosperity section is the back left 9th, (3,1). The first time I did a big clearing on the major financial area of my home, I had a $3000 windfall. Never saw that much money again as a result of a clearing, though.)
People who follow, or who are at least familiar with, the basic principles of Feng Shui will understand what I’m talking about. You may have read Karen Kingston’s Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui, which is a powerful book if you have trouble letting go of stuff.* My girlfriend found it first. I knew something was up when she re-read it twice and wouldn’t loan it to me. I finally bought my own copy on a Wednesday. Read it by Friday morning with a three-day weekend to follow. By the time I went back to work, I had let three truckloads of stuff to go, 1 ½ each to the dump and to the thrift shop, including some things that had followed me through at least three moves.
The older I get, the more I notice awareness of a place’s “energy.” Moving clutter and old projects releases a lot of sticky, heavy energy. Ergo the fan, to help move the air around the room when the a/c is not actually running. I work until I find that I’m having a bit of trouble breathing, and then step away. It doesn’t all have to be done today. It was this way for a while.
Whacked? Maybe. Last time I did a major Feng Shui clearing in my home, a mirror fell into the bathroom sink. It cracked a hole in the porcelain and I had to buy a new sink. I had taken all my clothes out of the closet to caulk leaks. That closet had not been empty since I moved in, 11 years earlier. Now, I’m more careful about how much energy I release at any one time.
I do not believe that clearing the Love and Romance section alone is going to bring hearts and flowers back into our communication. We have a few rocks in the road, and they’re going to take heavy lifting to shift. That said, it never hurts to clean. I take a casual approach to housekeeping. We have six dogs and three cats. There’s always something that could be cleaner. And this room is full. Not actually dirty, mind you; simply full. Full of projects, mending, ideas, raw material. Three sewing machines and two worktables; a file cabinet and a pattern cabinet and a bookshelf and all loaded, some to the ceiling. There’s room for “cleaner;” there are certainly projects whose time has come, and gone.
I can’t tell you what you can do to improve the Feng Shui of any particular part of a room or your house. There are plenty of professionals in the field who can help you with that. I am also NOT talking about any of the degrees of chronic disorganization or hoarding, but rather to people who acquire stuff as easily as they breathe, and who can still muster the discipline, when needed, to edit and sort and rehome some of what they collect.
BTW, the 27-fling Boogie is one element of The Flylady’s guide to a clean house. Start tidying up, and don’t quit until 27 things have found a new home. It’s ok if the new home is the trash can or the Thrift Shop donation bag. (Use Itsdeductible.com to put a value on your donations.) I can usually focus on cleaning for 27 things. On a bad day, I’ll be able to do several rounds of 27 Fling Boogies, but even 27 things restored to their right place will make a home feel better. (Right now, I could do at least one 27 Fling on my dresser, without moving my feet. Not happy that I’ve let it get to that state.)
If your relationship has hit a communication snag, the best advice is to find a way to talk about what the problem is. However, if you can’t do that at this moment, make sure your Love and Romance section is right / clear / clean, and see what happens.
*Unfortunately, it’s only a little bit about Feng Shui, and today, I don’t agree with everything she has to say about letting go of clutter, most especially about not needing to own books, and colon cleansing. However, the first time I read the book, I really did release three truckloads of stuff, and that was good for me and for this house.